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Tuesday, September 18, 2007

'DO YOU TRUST ME ENOUGH TO DO IT MY WAY......'

Huge statement for someone who suffers from chronic 'do it my own way' syndrome. I have been struck by this phrase over and over again this week and last. God has been working asking me over and over 'Louise do you TRUST me enough to do it MY way'.....why is it that by human nature I want to take everything under my own control and try to do it all on my own and then only when I fail I ask for help. I have been asking God to mold me and shape me into what He wants me to be and first and foremost USE me...I have had amazing experiences this past year that show me that I am being used and then I try to grab hold of the horns and 'take over' from God, like who am I kidding right? Over and over and I am reminded that I need to trust and rely in Him for He knows the path that I am on better than anyone and knows me better than I know myself and I need to let go and trust, trust Him that his grace is sufficient ,trust Him that all things work together for the good of those who love him and believe that He is enough no matter what the circumstance, the challenge or the trial. When I am nervous and try to pre-organize things in my head as to what to say, how to act, (what to wear..how silly I know) I will have to choose to trust and believe that I will make the right choice and that God will give me the words to speak in the moment.

Why am I bringing this all up...well as many of you know I am part of the new series (Episode 1 )of No Opportunity Wasted on CBC and I have interviews coming up and well I am SCARED, NERVOUS and terrified of this whole experience, the show has been filmed, edited and ready to air and I know that I have no control over what parts they choose to air and how I will be portrayed but it is huge vulnerability not only because that experience caused so many emotions to flow in me (yes MANY tears)and it will be there for all of Canada to see but I am not exactly your 'typical' TV person with full hair and makeup done, and I know it is stupid to worry about that but man am I nervous., I pray that people can look beyond what they see and understand the heart of this episode and be inspired by my experience and go out and try new things ... So far I have one interview scheduled and I don't know if others will come but again through all this I hear the still small voice echoing inside me saying 'Louise do you trust me?' and I choose to say a resounding YES...do I 'feel' it..no.. not yet but it will come, I have to believe it will.....SO that's it right there...TRUST..smallish word HUGE impact!!

10 comments:

Alison said...

You are so beautiful Louise, inside and out.....anyone can see that!!! You are going to do amazing!!

Wanda said...

Yes, Alison said it well! My dear Louise..You are best "Hands" and this is an opportunity "He" is allowing you to participate in...and as Alison said and I agree, YOU ARE GOING TO DO AMAZING!!! Can I get CBC in CA.??

Louise said...

Alison and Wanda
Thanks for your kind words!! man its nice to hear....
Wanda-don't know if you can get it out there unless maybe you have satelite?! not sure..sorry, maybe I can send you a copy ;)

ValleyGirl said...

Oh Louise, all any of us are going to be thinking is, "Dang, that girl makes climbing mountains look so easy!!" I'm so looking forward to seeing it and I'm sure you'll do fine in the interviews, too. Just keep trusting the Still Small Voice.

Rose said...

First I want to say Louise that you have accomplished something that many of us would be too scared to even enter never mind really do it and not give up, you are so brave. I believe that God put you on that show for a reason and he will show you in his time. He helped you face your fear, and I believe much bigger things will come from this and he will use you and you will be ready. You are so beautiful Louise inside and out, it radiates through you, they will have to put blinders on the cameras. I'm so looking forward to seeing my Sister kick butt and I'm so proud you faced your fear. Love you!

Ruth said...

i think you are migty bold and brave.

2 weeks! i can't wait! you're gonna be a local celebrity. :)

Andrea said...

I second what Ruth said! (and everybody else, for that matter)

I can imagine the fear and anxiousness you are feeling -- but I hope when all is said and done you wouldn't want to trade this experience for ANYTHING!!

Louise said...

Thanks everyone for your kind an thoughtfull responses!!
This has been a great experience and I am SO thankful to have had it and I wouldn't trade it for anything...the interview stuff scares me but I'll be okay..I can do it!
Thanks again everyone!! I appreciate you all!

it's a gong show... said...

Great post Louise! I can hardly wait to see your grand adventure. I will pray that He is with you through all of this.

svea said...

beautiful vulnerability. Thanks for sharing and that is what i love about. you are authentic, it's the one word I picked for you way back when on the one word survey thing. and it is true canada will see that and i know people will be touched by your heart and gain courage by your vulnerability and growth! hugs to you missed you at MOPS